Alright I'm gonna post my review here rather than on DKB cause they dont know me as a pervert over there so...
BLACK SWAN REVIEW
Finally saw this shit by myself in the theatre. However if you're thinking about this don't see it in the theatre. Certain people don't know how to respond to hot people fucking and they laugh cause they're "uncomfortable". God, shut the fuck self-doubting middleaged couple. I didn't come to hear your annoying giggling, I'm trying to focus on the boner I'm getting from watching Natalie Portman gyrate.
Also about the theatre audience. The audience didn't match the material on screen and this is never good. I mean on screen you have:
- Multiple scenes of Natalie Portman touching herself
Ass shots/leg shots/feet shots
Awesome lesbian sex
Awesome sexually charged dialouge all about sex
Skin getting ripped off
Blood, seeing blood
Feet/limbs getting twisted around and mangled
Creepy demon creatures
Multiple jump scares
So you think for a movie like that you'd have a theatre full of horny frat dudes or some shit. But check it out, I was the one soul dude that came alone. The rest were all couples and the only other people that came alone were chicks. You'd think this shit was a chick flick and not a Darren Aronofsky horror/pseudo porn.
And then I realized: these people probably only knew that the movie was about ballerinas and shit assumed it was a chick flick without looking into the plot. Hahaha, dumbasses.
So Natalie Portman plays this schizoid obsessed ballerina chick who's super hot but is totally insane because she has an extremely scary, deranged overprotective mom who draws paintings of her daughter making sad faces. It doesn't help that the boss at her job is an extreme creeper who wants to fuck her and that the new girl played by Mila Kunis doesn't really give a shit.
So the movie continues as Natalie Portman gets more and more insane, and the movie itself gets more and more insane. Hey Charles, look for a cameo by Jimmy in the bus scene.
I think this is the only movie I've ever seen in the theatres that gave me a raging boner that wouldn't go down. Really good direction, the boner never dies. I thought I was going to pass out from blue balls.
Great dialouge in this movie though, as I said. My favorite part was when Vincent Cassel said "Nina, I have a homework assignment for you: go home and touch yourself."
Shit man, if that was my homework I'd always have an A.
I also loved:
WAITER: I made a steak for you, its extra juicy.
MILA KUNIS: I bet you did.
WAITER: Do you want any cheese with that?
MILA KUNIS: You've already given me enough thanks.
Love it. Natalie Portman was so crazy awesome in this. Great horror scenes at the end that reminded me of Suspiria. Brad should see this.
Good movie. I give it an A for Natalie Portman's Ass.